Saturday, May 18, 2013

Sugar cookies with frosting

Yesterday we made cookies for my sister-friend. I knew it would be a long day at work for her, the weather was perfect for baking, and I wanted to. It also gave me a great reason to go for a walk with my boys (something I always enjoy/hate all at the same time).


I decided to make some sugar cookies using a recipe I got (and tweaked) in college. It is my go to sugar recipe. I would have done chocolate chip cookies, but we only have chocolate/mint chips and cinnamon chips. Not a big deal but both have reasons for being in the freezer and not being used. Anyway, I also decided to make some grenadine frosting. I bought some to make a Shirley Temple cake. That was an interesting cake (very sweet) but we don't buy soda and I wanted to find a way to use what I have in the pantry. This might not have been the quickest way to use it up but it was an intersting idea so I ran with it. There are a few different recipes on the internet for grenadine frosting. I went with the simplest and halved it because I knew we wouldn't need that much, also I was planning on using some sweetened lime syrup (by the same company) to make the other half with. Overall I was happy with how it all turned out. Sister-friend's co-workers said it was yummy and H loves the grenadine frosting. I may be the only fan of the lime...it is an acquired taste and a little goes a long way because it is quite sweet.

Here are the recipes I used.

Easy sugar cookies
- Adapted from a recipe from allrecipes.com back in 2002

2 3/4 c. all-purpose flour (I used whole wheat)
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp baking powder
1 c. butter, softened
3/4 c. white sugar
3/4 c. brown sugar
1 egg
1 tsp vanilla

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F. In a small bowl combine flour, baking soda, and baking soda. Set aside.

In a large bowl, cream together the butter and sugars until smooth. Beat in the egg and vanilla. Gradually blend the dry ingredients. Roll rounded teaspoonfuls of dough into balls and place onto ungreased cookie sheets.

Bake 8-10 minutes in the preheated oven or until golden (I found 10 minutes was perfect for the wheat flour). Let stand on cookie sheet two minutes to cool before moving to wire racks (they will look a little under cooked in the cracks and need some time to set up before being removed or they'll fall apart).


Grenadine Frosting

1/4 c. butter, softened
1 c. powedered sugar
1-2 tbsp. grenadine (start with 1 and add more to taste)

Mix together the butter and sugar with a fork. Add in the grenadine and stir until combined.

I used this same recipe but changed the grenadine for the sweetened lime concentrate to make the lime flavor.



Sunday, April 28, 2013

Sleeping

Sometimes when I look at my children sleeping all I want to do is hold them. They are so sweet and innocent. W especially makes me want to hold him. He is so small and yet so big. He's grown so much. Life moves too quickly. Holding them (any one of them) while they sleep feels like I'm pausing time for just a little while.

Friday, April 26, 2013

Letting go

I thought letting go on the first day of kindergarten was hard, and it was. Tonight somehow feels more difficult. H is away at a slumber party. He's stayed at a friends house before and I was okay with it. I've left town and had him stay with grandparents. I've been in the hospital giving birth and had him staying with aunts and uncles. Still, tonight feels more difficult.


He was leery of leaving. He's been more clingy lately with both Husband and me. He wasn't sure and that makes it harder for me to be sure he'll be fine. That little boy can infuriate me one second and melt my heart the next. Right now my heart is nervous and scared. I'm afraid he's feeling nervous and scared. I'm afraid he misses me and I can't be there like he needs. He's growing up and I'm having a hard time letting go. 

He was so excited about this party last week. Then he found out I wouldn't be going and that was only okay because he could bring a cuddly toy. This morning he didn't want to go camping without his daddy, and he didn't like tents (not true). As he left he seemed excited. He had a friend and there were two sleeping bags in the trunk (along with two pillows, backpacks, and presents). He was ready to go. I have no idea if he kept that demeanor, but I hope he did. 

Don't get me wrong, I trust the people he is with. I know he likes the children he'll be hanging out with. I'm just a mom having a hard time letting her first baby boy go and grow up a little. It's been nice having a break. The twins were in bed early (no naps today) and W was easy. We had some nice us time and he went down at his normal time. I've been able to relax. It's been great. Still, when the twins come and get me (which has happened a couple of times) I'm aware of the empty bed in their room. Growing up is hard, and as a parent I think it might even be a little harder to watch. 

I never realized how much I loved being in control of everything until now - this past year. He's been exposed to so much and experienced so much that I can't control. I'd love to control everyone else's children and make sure they're all nice and he never gets hurt and he excels in all areas of school and never looses recess and the list goes on. I can't. Letting go...

Cute picture minus the dirty foot
Cracks me up. The picture was taken
at the perfect moment.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Ramblings

I don't feel as though I have too much to say, but I do want to "write."

Life has been so interesting lately. W is learning to crawl. He's mastered movement so quickly. Two Saturday's ago he got on his knees and started rocking, a few days later he started pushing forward with his toes while laying down, a few days after that he started army crawling, the next day he truly started trying to move his knees forward (and then he moves them back), and then over the next two days (which brings us to now) he usually gets one knee moved forward and placed before falling back on his belly. I'm amazed. He's pretty fast with the army crawl too, especially if a cell phone is the bait on the floor.

The last few weeks at school have been difficult for H behaviorly. The same can be said of his behavior at home. H is struggling with listening. He's five. He's a very active little boy. He's smart; sometimes that gets him into more trouble. He's cute and he's learning that that won't get him out of trouble. We're working on manners, on not yelling or speaking unkindly, on being polite and respectful, on how to act in the million situations that arise every day. He struggles with asking to touch something before actually touching it. He loves to wrestle and do demolition work with his daddy. He has such a sweet side that is sometimes so over shadowed by his 5-year-old, aggressive, active, self-centered self. And then tonight, when we are talking about whining and how blessed we are and how there are children who are not as blessed he says, "Can we bring them to our house? Why can't we help them all?" My eyes teared up. He's learning. I know I fail him daily in showing him patience, some days I feel like he's always in trouble, but he's learning and if I pay attention I can see all throughout the day how he's trying to bless the lives of those around him, how he's trying to be kind and loving, how he's yelling because he's upset with his brother but he's using kind words like please or excuse me, how he's so sensitive and wants to be everybody's friend. He shows me the type of person I need to be (not whiny or aggressive, but concerned for others :) ).

The twins have been clingy. They did really well after W was born, and the honeymoon period has been over for a while. They're ready to have as much of my attention as possible. They want to cuddle and love on me constantly. They want to be held and to sit on my lap or next to me all the time. Now when I say I have to feed W I will sometimes hear a no instead of an ok. They are both more opinionated than they used to be. J is more loud about his defiance. G likes to try and fly under the radar, thinking if he doesn't answer or he quietly does something else no one will notice. I see them playing more but also fighting more. They're learning to be individuals. They are extremely focused on the color of things because blue means it "belongs" to G and green means it "belongs" to J. They even see things in orange, red, yellow, pink, purple, etc. and decided that those colors mean it "belongs" to other specific people. I had no clue that one day my children would be color coded, even when we found out we were having twins that wasn't a thought in my brain. Here I am 3.5 years later and so much of our lives is separated by color - dishes, clothes, toys. Some of it is done by me and some by them. We were at a friend's house and G found two tape measures, a green one and a blue one. He took the green one to J and kept the blue one to play with himself.

My boys are growing. W is 7 months old, the twins are 3.5-years-old, H is 5-years-old. It is hard to believe.

We met with some friends yesterday that we haven't seen for about two years. Their daughter is four. She's changed a lot in those two years and at the same time she's stayed the same. It was weird to see her as she is when I picture her as she was. I was talking to my friend and she commented on how big the boys were. She stated that it doesn't surprise her that her daughter has grown, but not seeing our kids it was easy to forget that other kids grow too. It's true. Those big changes are so startling. The problem with the little changes is that they are so small we adjust easily or don't even notice and then when we look back the change is so obvious and shocking. H is graduating from Kindergarten this year. Time has flown. It doesn't seem possible that this first little boy who made me a mommy, who was a scrawny little thing to begin with, who crawled around 9 months and walked around 11 months, who used to blow raspberries on my arm to make me laugh when he could see I was frustrated is old enough to be in school and is so close to finishing his first school year. I'm trying to cherish it as I work on surviving it.

Monday, April 15, 2013

A smile captured

I don't think I've ever captured my boys smiling in their sleep. I know I've seen it, cherished it. Last night I caught it on "film." The picture melts my heart. It makes me smile. It isn't a perfectly executed photo, but I love it all the same. 


Friday, March 29, 2013

Daily struggles

I am a very blessed mother of four boys. Three of those boys are silly, rambunctious, loving boys. Someday soon I am sure the fourth will join them. He already knows how to make a raucous and get attention. I often try to remind myself about how truly blessed I am. My boys are healthy. They have the ability to attend school free of charge. H is even in a bilingual program without our having to pay for it. I've been to other countries and seen children playing with sticks in filth. I've seen them so excited to be given a used plastic water bottle. My house is small for our family of six, but we fit just fine. We have food and clean water. They have more toys than they need. We aren't separated from one another. I am able to stay home with them instead of having to work. These are the things I want myself to focus on when I'm struggling and frustrated. These are the things I want myself to think about when someone dumps a cup of water on the bed when they should be sleeping, or when I have to try and wrangle three rowdy boys in a restaurant, or when I am so very tired and all they want is for me to play with them or cuddle with them. Some nights, like tonight, I fail. I feel terrible (thank you allergies and sinuses) and I didn't get much sleep last night. I didn't cuddle and speak calmly to them. I failed with a great big F--. It happens. Thankfully it is happening less often than it used to. Tomorrow I will try again. I don't want them to remember the daily struggles we had with one another (fighting over a toy, Mama always being frustrated, yelling, spanking). I know these things will be in their memory, but I don't want them to stand out. I want them to remember always that we read a story, sing a song, and pray before bed. I want them to remember playing in the backyard on the swing set Daddy built. I want them to understand what it means to be kind, generous, honest, respectful, and hard-work; and I want to be the one who demonstrates that for them. I want them to know there is a time to have fun and a time to sit still. I want them to remember sitting around our table for meals regardless of whether or not our whole family could be there - I want them know that is where the family that is present eats and they do it together. I want them to remember love and hugs and cuddles from me, Husband, and each other. I want them to remember that we always made them apologize and give hugs and that this doesn't always fix the problem, but it's a start. There is so much I have to teach them, and there is even more that they teach me. My flaws are so present and obvious in how they act and react to life around them. I want to change me so that I can help them to grow. And to do this, to be a better person and mother, I must remind myself of all the blessing, big and small that I have. I must also point those blessing out to our children. So, here I am saying that I fail on a daily basis, and tonight was a more major fail that usual, but I am still so happy to be their mom. I am still so full of love for those boys who refuse to go to sleep, two of which are currently sleeping on the floor, who wake me up at ridiculous hours (all from the age of 6 months to 5 years) for various reasons, and who love to cuddle me and hang on me and hug me and give me kisses. I know the daily struggles won't go away, and I am sure that I will blog about them again and I know they will change as the boys get older (way to scary to think about now), but at this moment I am going to let go of my frustration and focus on my blessings and get some rest so we can all try to do better tomorrow.

My boys, blessings, and trials:
G - 3 years old
H - 5.5 years old
J - 3 years old
J, W, G, and H
W - 6.5 months old

Sunday, March 17, 2013

LA Marathon 2013

Today was the LA Marathon. Last year Husband decided to run the marathon in January, which gave him about 10 weeks to train. Not the best plan. This year's marathon was much more thought out and he started training in October. He did AMAZING! First, he ran 26.2 miles which already deserves a medal or a cookie or both. In addition to running that insane distance he also beat his time from last year by 34 minutes (and 4 seconds). SO AWESOME! Can you tell I'm proud?

I love being there to see him cross the finish line, but I also love the little mini vacation that has come with this trip for the last two years. Both years my sister-friend has come with me and we get some cool hang out time we don't get now that we're both "grown up" and have "lives." This year she was more about helping out with W, since he tagged along (he is only 6 months), but she also brought her awesome camera which I had a blast using and I definitely couldn't have done everything I did if it was just W and me.


Because Husband took the week off to run the marathon we were able to be a little more leisurely about things. We went to the LA Convention Center to pick up his bib number and look around. While there we tried a few free samples and recorded a few second video of W's adorable smile to pop up during the race to encourage Husband along.

Getting his racing bib

Next we went to Santa Monica and checked into our hotel, the Hotel Carmel. We walked down to Bruno's, an Italian restaurant that was wonderful and totally worth going to and I would go there again if I got the chance because it is that good. It's a sweet mom and pop shop. We met Bruno, the food was amazing, and everyone thought W was adorable. After dinner (and feeling way to full on some carb-o-licious pasta) we walked down the pier and looked around. No rides or anything, but I'm pretty sure none of us really wanted to go on any of the rides. The coolest part of the pier was watching someone catch an octopus. I wish I had taken a picture, but I didn't think about it. The octopus was about the size of a small ball (the head could fit in my hand) and his tentacles were moving around. A little weird, a lot awesome - he kept it and I think that was the weirdest part of all. I did not know people "fished" for octopi...maybe they don't, but then why would he keep it.



The ferris wheel
The fishing poles
From there we went back to the hotel and hung out and then went to bed.

Husband was up bright and early, got ready, and headed for the shuttle to take him to the start line. Sister-friend and I slept a little longer (after eating a little bit when Husband left) and then we got up and got ready. We packed up and checked out and headed to breakfast at The Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf (that's where we went last year). We then headed to the finish line to see a friend cross. There was lots of standing around waiting, we saw our friend cross the line and then waited for Husband. He made it, we followed him (sort of - we were on the other side of the fence pacing him) and let him know we would meet him at the end. It was crazy and hectic but we finally found each other. We went back to the hotel, he changed, we got our car from valet, and we headed home.


Santa Monica Blvd. (because we can't go without me hearing
the song in my head)
Converse display
After finishing (in the red in the middle)
Wearing his heat blanket (middle) walking with our friend
It was such a great weekend. Our boys had fun with friends and family, I had a mini vacation for the  most part, and Husband rocked it. I'm glad this is only a once a year thing, and I'm not sad that he has decided to probably not do it again for a while (training is difficult with four little ones), but I am glad he did it. I already knew how awesome and amazing he is, but I love that he has done something to show our boys how important it is to be healthy and how you can do anything you put your mind to (even if it is a wee bit crazy).