A full day

It has been a full day. There was a small amount of cleaning done this morning and some prep for our outing to the zoo. I had a quick appointment with the doctor to get drops for my eye (woke up with pink eye) in an effort to keep my kids healthy. Then we ran a couple errands on the way to lunch with some friends. After that it was off to San Diego to see the animals and their Christmas lights after dark. The boys all seemed to enjoy themselves and it was a nice time with friends. Husband and I are now exhausted. Must rest while I can since tomorrow is another fun filled day.

Muffins

I am not a creative baker. It's true, I don't follow all recipes to a tee (ok, most recipes) but I try to stick fairly close. I bought some pomegranate seeds at Fresh and Easy on daily special and I wanted to make some muffins with them. The only problem is I didn't want to use oil and I'm out of applesauce. If I didn't have to take the three boys with me, getting applesauce might not be that big a deal. Since I didn't feel like making a trip to the store, I started looking on-line for some ideas of what to do. That's when I came across the idea of mashed beans. The author of a blog post mentioned using mashed kidney beans, and that's what I decided to use. I combined a few recipes from my Better Homes and Gardens Cook Book and here's what I came up with. 

Oatmeal-Pomegranate Muffins

1 c. flour

3/4 c. oats

1/3 c. wheat bran (can use flour if you don't have this)

1/3 c. + 2 tbsp. brown sugar

2 tsp. baking powder

1/4 tsp. salt

1 beaten egg

3/4 c. milk

1/4 c. mashed kidney beans (I put some no-sodium canned kidney beans in the food processor and let it go until they were a goo. This is in place of the oil).

About 1 c. pomegranate seeds (I used a 5.3 oz container from Fresh and Easy)

1. Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Grease/line muffin tin. 

2. In medium bowl combine flour, oats, wheat bran, sugar, baking powder, and salt. 

3. In another bowl combine egg, milk, and mashed kidney beans. Add egg mixture to dry ingredients all at once (make a well in the center of the dry ingredients and dump the egg mixture in). Stir just until moistened.

4. Fold in pomegranate seeds. 

5. Spoon batter into prepared muffin cups, filling each two-thirds full. Bake for 15-18 minutes (mini muffins take between 10 and 15 min.) or until golden brown a wooden toothpick comes out clean. Cool in muffin cups on a wire rack for 5 min. Remove from muffin cups and serve warm.

*I would probably add 1 tsp. vanilla to this. I didn't because it wasn't called for, but I know it would make it that much more awesome. They have great flavor and are very mild. If you add just a smidge of whip cream (I gave the boys about a tsp. to dip their muffins in) it adds just the right amount of sweet.

Sunshine

Yesterday was a hard day. This past week has been difficult. And yet, I love that there are always reminders of how difficult times don't mean all is lost. Despite all the issues with behavior and whatever else these past few days, I am beyond blessed. My life is full of sunshine, even when a few gray clouds may find their way into my line of sight.

I picked my mom up from the airport. I love her, and after seeing her for a matter of minutes, things seemed suddenly sunshine-ier. I know that when my husband arrives in a few days, things won't be able to get any brighter.

Sunshine Moments:
- While at church today the boys were in their class and I was in mine. I rarely have time away from them and it was nice to not be distracted by them.
- I tried to remember to play with H and focus on the two of us enjoying things together instead of getting on his case for being slow about eating (we had McDonald's for lunch). His smile was worth it!

- The twins were hugging each other and holding hands and playing in their own little world and I soaked up the love that I doubt the will always be so willing to show the world.
- I read a comment on yesterday's post that reminded me everyone has days like yesterday.
- The boys all napped today on the way to pick up my mom. I had an hour (that I would have loved to have spent napping too) to think about all that is/has been going on. It was a blissfully quiet hour where I was able to listen to my music.
- My mom bought the boys playdoh for their birthday which I know will entertain all three of them for at least an hour tomorrow (it's the miracle toy for my busy bunch).

Small things that add up to big smiles. Little rays of sunshine that break through the gray clouds I sometimes focus on. Blessings I sometimes forget about, but love to be reminded of.

Blog your heart

I'm struggling. My Grandma H. is in the hospital (she's doing better) and I am helping out family. I struggle daily with my boys. They're all very stubborn in their own ways, but usually they cooperate. The past several days that has not been true. I've been staying at my Grandma W.'s house and it is not very child friendly. There are cups with pens, scissors, emery boards, pins/needles, nail clippers, etc. around the house. There are lots of pretties that shouldn't be touched. Everything is on their level and most of it is not for their hands. H has been especially difficult the last several days. He's been defiant, disrespectful, and doesn't listen; and I'm struggling. It already seems that nothing I do works with him (he's 4 and there are days where I feel I'm already want to give up, how am I going to make it through the teens?). I can say that here the everything I already do is used up faster and the extra that I find to do to make him listen still doesn't seem to help (if that makes sense). He has no fear. He's not afraid, or respectful, of me. He doesn't listen to anyone (grandparents included), and I here I sit on the verge of tears. I don't know how I went from a child who listens and people compliment me on how polite he is to a child who is rude and doesn't do as he's told. I know he's 4, and I know he's a boy, and I know he's at an age where he's trying to be independent, and I know he just wants to do what he wants to do, but I don't feel like I can handle it. That frustration and despair is made worse because we aren't at home and it requires me to be even more firm on things that might not otherwise matter. I don't know what to do. I'm at a loss. I feel like a terrible mother. I'm frustrated and angry. I just want a break, but there isn't one to be had. I'll be here for several more days, and while I know my mama will be here tomorrow, and my husband will get here Wednesday, that still leaves a lot of days in between before I can just have a moment for me. There are projects I planned on getting done that remain unpacked and unfinshed/unstarted. There are places I'd like to go or things I want to do, but it isn't conducive to helping my daddy. I just have to hold out a few more days. Here's hoping that, when the time comes and we go home, it will all be better in the future. Here's hoping I can make a few more days. Here's hoping this struggle makes me stronger and doesn't kill me.

To make me happy

After a long day, where most of the afternoon/evening was spent as a battle of the wills, H woke up and came to me after being asleep for a couple of hours. He said he wanted to make me happy and make me laugh and then he made some silly faces. I did smile and laugh. Moments like those give me hope. Despite current frustrations, he's a sweet boy and I love him!

Two Doubled

J and G leaving the hospital

Monday the twins turn two. I am at a loss for how quickly time has passed. I look at new babies, ones that were bigger at birth than the twins, and I have a hard time remembering how small they felt and were. I look back at pictures of them. They were so tiny (5 lbs 13 oz and 6 lbs 3 oz). Now they walk, talk, run, climb, color, etc. If you can show them they can do it. If H does it, they want to do it. Life is still so wonderful and amazing for them.

In the past few months both boys have began talking more. They say: hat, shoes, socks, head, nose, cheek, ow, H, G, J, Mama, Daddy, Becca, Sadie, Seth, please, thank you, ball, dog, cat, cheese, balloon, and train. There are more word sprinkled amongst these. They seem to be more opinionated about their food now. As always, they are sometimes opposites (G likes pineapple and J doesn't prefer it) and then when I tell people that they switch it up on me (J ate pineapple on Thanksgiving). They make life much more active and interesting. They cling more than H did at this age, I think. They love each other and I love watching them interact. They love H and want to be with him doing what he does a lot of times, but they also have moments when they want to be alone. They still sleep in the same bed and most of the time can be found all cuddled up together.

A year old

They are part of my joy. I couldn't have forseen how wonderful life would be with my three boys. I remember laughing when I found out we were having twins. I didn't know what else to do. There are still times when I have no clue what to do, but life is better with them in it.

Two years old